The burglars broke into our house through a back window, a classically vulnerable location where it was dark, not visible by neighbors or people passing by, and adjacent to an area of vacant land where they could make their escape.
I had left the sliding windows in one of the bedrooms open slightly for ventilation and placed rods in the tracks so the windows couldn't be opened further, or so I thought. The thieves tried one window, gave up, and then must have reached in and used a stick or something to dislodge the rod in the other window. We know the point of entry because of the damaged screens and the muddy footprints that originated there and then tracked through the rest of the house on our brand new carpet.
This happened while we were 6500 miles away in Bhutan, a very peaceful country where the influence of Buddhism makes this kind of crime rare. Actually it is also rare in our small Hawaiian community relative to other parts of the U.S., but it still does happen and seems to be on an uptick with the economic downturn. We learned of the break-in while we were on our trip in emails from our neighbors and from our handyman who checks our house each week while we are gone. We have asked them NOT to contact us about major problems while we travel unless there is something we can actually do about the situation -- our philosophy is why ruin a trip when it won't accomplish anything?
In this case, though, we were able to give them instructions that turned out to be crucial. For example, we asked them to look for our spare car keys and discovered that the thieves had taken them, possibly planning to return to steal one or both cars. Our neighbors were able to secure the garage by parking one of their own cars in front of the door to prevent this until we returned and had the ignition locks changed.
Our attitude toward home security has always been pretty casual because we don't have a lot of expensive art, jewelery, or electronics. Investing in an alarm system or a safe seemed hardly worth it, given the value of our potential losses.
Now we realize that our loss was far greater than we imagined -- not in monetary terms, but in the psychological impact the break-in has had on us. The emotions we have felt have been a complex mixture of fear, anger, violation, vulnerability, contamination, loss of control, and sadness. The sadness and anger arise from our realization that many of the items taken were more valuable to us than we thought because of their intimate sentimental meaningfulness. For example, most of my wife's stolen jewelry was collected during our travels over the past 40+ years and although it wasn't terribly expensive, each piece was associated with a particular memory and cannot be replaced. Our anger in this case arises partly from a sense of unfairness: the thieves got very little while we lost a great deal.
The feelings of violation and contamination were particularly strong at first, when the muddy footprints and jumbled contents of closets on the floor were vivid signs that an intruder had walked through every room and had pawed through every drawer. Judging from the large size of the footprints, one of the burglars was male. But there were also indications that one was female -- ten pairs of my wife's shoes were gone, carefully selected from many other pairs, and some of her favorite purses and scarves. [Male readers should consult a woman to gain an appreciation for the depth of response my wife had to this.]
Vulnerability and loss of control are very uncomfortable feelings, and throughout our lives we go to great mental and behavioral lengths to avoid them, even when the control and security we think we have achieved is illusory. In my case this has meant spending a great deal of effort in closing the barn door after the horse has left. I modified the windows throughout the house to prevent future thieves from duplicating the successful break-in. I installed motion activated lights to eliminate the dark areas where burglars could work undetected. And at least for a while we have been more careful to lock doors and windows even when we leave for a short while. We've also tried to convince ourselves that this was just a crime of opportunity and that we really don't present a juicy target to desperadoes. Illusion or not, doing these things feels very positive.
There is some good that has come out of this. I realize what wonderful neighbors and friends we have and how much they are willing to do on our behalf. They provide a very comforting balance to the despicable behavior of the burglars.
I also have learned a worthwhile lesson about attachment to possessions --namely that although I can pride myself on not being beguiled by their monetary value, I have unwittingly invested a great deal of emotional capital in them. But the wonderful experiences that generated their sentimental value cannot be stolen and thieves can never truly cash in on their loot. The experiences, not the objects, make us rich. If I can just convince myself of the truth of this pearl of wisdom, I might even be able to feel a degree of compassion for the burglars -- the experiences they have violating other people can never bring them any real benefit.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
Bummin' With Buddha In Bhutan
As a tourist destination, Bhutan offers what many of us seek in a travel experience; a colorful, exotic culture with a rich and important history in a beautiful physical setting. However, this tiny country also has several unique characteristics that make it particularly fascinating. For one thing, it is a country that -- though friendly and welcoming once you're there -- has historically closed itself off from the outside world. Tourists were not allowed in Bhutan until 1974, and even now are tightly controlled and even banned in certain areas to protect the culture. A visitor must travel as part of a supervised group or as many do (including us) with a personal guide and driver, enter or leave the country only via the state airline, Druk Air, and spend a minimum per day of $200 (this will increase to $250 in 2012). These policies restrict the number of tourists and their activities and so far have mitigated some of the problems mass tourism usually brings to underdeveloped countries. It is also a fiercely vertical country, an attraction especially to those who enjoy multi-day trekking expeditions. We stuck to day hikes and traveling by car. Even so, my gps measured an accumulated elevation gain of 92,000 feet as we journeyed west to east and back, crossing high mountain passes between picturesque valleys along the country's only main "highway," a very scenic but scary road 1 1/2 lanes wide in most places. Average moving speed according to the gps was 18 mph, leading some days to what we called "Bhutan Butt Rash."
The magical aspect of Bhutanese culture is perhaps not that different than similar beliefs in many other countries and religious orientations, including our own, but may be problematic in Bhutan in at least a couple of ways. First, Bhutan is a country that is emerging from its historic isolation with a jolt. Somehow these traditional beliefs must be reconciled with the wider world that Bhutanese will encounter, and this may involve adjustment difficulties at both the personal and societal level. Up to now there have been no challenges to magical and supernatural beliefs and I wonder if the Bhutanese monastic order has considered how to adapt to such challenges, as has been done successfully in other parts of the world where Buddhist practice is quite compatible with secular and scientific modes of thinking.
A second problem for me is that Western visitors to Bhutan come away with the mistaken impression that magical thinking is an essential characteristic of Buddhism in general -- for instance, that in order to be a Buddhist you must believe that monks can fly on the backs of tigers. An example is a man from the U.S.we met as we left Bhutan who had just finished a National Geographic tour of the country. He really enjoyed Bhutan, he said, "but I really didn't buy all that Buddhist stuff." National Geographic organizes high-end expeditions all over the world that supposedly provide highly informative and educational travel experiences. Yet this man's comments suggested a rather murky understanding of what he saw and rather than opening him to the possibility of an alternative religious approach the tour seems to have had the opposite effect. This is unfortunate, because my own study of Buddhism has convinced me of its value without any reliance on flying tigers.
Whatever their beliefs, the Bhutanese have an undeniable charm and gentle dignity about them that is refreshing in today's climate of strife and polarization. Although I fear the odds are against them, I hope that they retain these "magical" qualities as their society encounters the outside world.I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
____________________________________
Suggested Reading:
What Makes You Not a Buddhist by Dzongsar Jamyang Khyentse
Buddha by Karen Armstrong
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Bankers' Math -- 0+0=5
Banks are scrambling to find new ways to charge for their services now that new regulations restrict some of their more lucrative practices, like automatically signing up people for high cost overdraft protection for debit cards, or charging merchants $.40 per debit card transaction. I've already written about higher ATM fees, which have risen in some cases to $4 or $5. Other increases include charges for returned items like checks or bounced electronic payments -- charges which are in principle justified, but not at the levels now being levied (for example, $30 for a declined ACH electronic transfer which requires little human intervention). And one of my favorites is a $1 to $2 fee just to find out your balance via an ATM.
The fee hikes and increasing number of fees are bad enough, but banks are apparently reluctant to reveal publicly what their fees are so that consumers can make comparisons. According to a research study presented in Consumer Reports, when 400 banks across the country were contacted "...fewer than half of the bank branches complied easily with a request for fee schedules. Under the Truth in Savings Act, banks are required to provide this information. However, only after two or more requests did 55 percent of branches provide fee schedules."
Of course, providing information in a clear and informative way may have negative results for the banks. For example, a recent study also by Consumer Reports found that only 22 percent of bank customers have opted-in for debit card overdraft protection now that new Federal regulations require banks to get permission before signing them up.
My own local bank, First Hawaiian, has recently shown that the Aloha Spirit is fine as long as it doesn't interfere with profits.
In the envelope with my monthly statement the other day was a little slip of paper detailing changes in account fees. There were the usual hikes like those mentioned above plus a couple of particularly puzzling ones. The first was an "Inactive Account Fee" of $10 for each month the account is considered inactive. Does it really cost the bank $10 per month to keep an account in its electronic database when there are no transactions into or out of it? Damn, the price of electrons must be skyrocketing!
Another one is a particularly good example of Bankers' Math. First Hawaiian doesn't charge a fee for receiving a paper statement each month (yet). If you elect to go Green and have only electronic statements sent to you that also is free. However, if you choose to have both a paper and an electronic statement the fee is $5 per month, despite the fact that the electronic image used to print and mail a paper statement is likely the same one available for viewing online.
In other words, according to Bankers' Math, 0 + 0 = 5.
___________________________
Related Blogs:
Bankers' Math -- Parts Un, Deux, Trois, Quatre, Cinq
The fee hikes and increasing number of fees are bad enough, but banks are apparently reluctant to reveal publicly what their fees are so that consumers can make comparisons. According to a research study presented in Consumer Reports, when 400 banks across the country were contacted "...fewer than half of the bank branches complied easily with a request for fee schedules. Under the Truth in Savings Act, banks are required to provide this information. However, only after two or more requests did 55 percent of branches provide fee schedules."
Of course, providing information in a clear and informative way may have negative results for the banks. For example, a recent study also by Consumer Reports found that only 22 percent of bank customers have opted-in for debit card overdraft protection now that new Federal regulations require banks to get permission before signing them up.
My own local bank, First Hawaiian, has recently shown that the Aloha Spirit is fine as long as it doesn't interfere with profits.
In the envelope with my monthly statement the other day was a little slip of paper detailing changes in account fees. There were the usual hikes like those mentioned above plus a couple of particularly puzzling ones. The first was an "Inactive Account Fee" of $10 for each month the account is considered inactive. Does it really cost the bank $10 per month to keep an account in its electronic database when there are no transactions into or out of it? Damn, the price of electrons must be skyrocketing!
Another one is a particularly good example of Bankers' Math. First Hawaiian doesn't charge a fee for receiving a paper statement each month (yet). If you elect to go Green and have only electronic statements sent to you that also is free. However, if you choose to have both a paper and an electronic statement the fee is $5 per month, despite the fact that the electronic image used to print and mail a paper statement is likely the same one available for viewing online.
In other words, according to Bankers' Math, 0 + 0 = 5.
___________________________
Related Blogs:
Bankers' Math -- Parts Un, Deux, Trois, Quatre, Cinq
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Punishing the Victims II -- The High Price of Being Poor
I yearn for the good old days when I didn't get a headache trying to follow the arguments of our political leaders and when I had the feeling that even though they disagreed they were willing to compromise to keep the government running.
Before the recent budget deadlock that nearly brought the country to a standstill, I voiced my disagreement with the Republican/Tea Party strategy for balancing the books because it seemed to put more of the burden on those least able to afford it, Americans of modest means who have suffered most from a recession caused by the investment decisions of Wall Street bankers.
As a central feature of their strategy, the Republicans/Tea Partiers (RTP) adamantly refused to increase revenue by allowing the Bush-era tax breaks for corporations and the wealthy to expire, and even proposed lowering their tax rates while simultaneously cutting spending for social programs that benefit ordinary people. Another idea was to reduce the amount companies have to pay workers, the logic being that this will stimulate growth by increasing profits. For example, one RTP proposal was to repeal an act that requires companies receiving federal contacts to pay workers at least at the level of prevailing local salaries and benefits. In short, the conservative economic strategy is to increase the income of corporations and the wealthy but cut the income and benefits of middle and lower class workers.
And now the latest development, which is perhaps the most difficult for me to follow, is that the RTP may push for allowing the temporary payroll tax break enacted as part of the Tax Relief Act of 2010 to expire next year, according to a recent AP report. Payroll taxes are levied only on payroll income, not income derived from capital gains, dividends, or other investment sources, and only on salaries up to $106,000. In other words, these taxes apply primarily to people in the middle and lower income brackets. Allowing the tax reduction to expire would increase revenue and help balance the budget, but it is exactly the kind of revenue increase the RTP fought so fiercely against during the debt deadlock when the expiration was for temporary income tax breaks for the wealthy.
The Regressive logic of this seeming contradiction is expressed by Texas Republican Representative Jeb Hensarling's comment, "...not all tax relief is created equal for the purposes of helping to get the economy moving again." That is, tax cuts for corporations and the wealthy are good because they may lead to investment and expansion, but tax cuts for workers aren't so good because they only allow families to buy groceries and pay their mortgage. Bottom line: to get the economy moving again, lower taxes on corporations and the wealthy and raise them on middle and low income workers.
The latest wrinkle in this drama is in President Obama's just-announced Jobs Package, in which he proposes temporarily continuing and increasing the reduction in Payroll Tax for workers (which the RTP should be against) and also reducing the employer contribution as well (which the RTP should support). The upcoming gymnastics of Regressive logic will be "interesting" to watch.
Time to buy more aspirin......
_________________________________________
Related Blogs:
Punishing the Victims (Part Un)
Misperceiving Wealth in America
Before the recent budget deadlock that nearly brought the country to a standstill, I voiced my disagreement with the Republican/Tea Party strategy for balancing the books because it seemed to put more of the burden on those least able to afford it, Americans of modest means who have suffered most from a recession caused by the investment decisions of Wall Street bankers.
As a central feature of their strategy, the Republicans/Tea Partiers (RTP) adamantly refused to increase revenue by allowing the Bush-era tax breaks for corporations and the wealthy to expire, and even proposed lowering their tax rates while simultaneously cutting spending for social programs that benefit ordinary people. Another idea was to reduce the amount companies have to pay workers, the logic being that this will stimulate growth by increasing profits. For example, one RTP proposal was to repeal an act that requires companies receiving federal contacts to pay workers at least at the level of prevailing local salaries and benefits. In short, the conservative economic strategy is to increase the income of corporations and the wealthy but cut the income and benefits of middle and lower class workers.
And now the latest development, which is perhaps the most difficult for me to follow, is that the RTP may push for allowing the temporary payroll tax break enacted as part of the Tax Relief Act of 2010 to expire next year, according to a recent AP report. Payroll taxes are levied only on payroll income, not income derived from capital gains, dividends, or other investment sources, and only on salaries up to $106,000. In other words, these taxes apply primarily to people in the middle and lower income brackets. Allowing the tax reduction to expire would increase revenue and help balance the budget, but it is exactly the kind of revenue increase the RTP fought so fiercely against during the debt deadlock when the expiration was for temporary income tax breaks for the wealthy.
The Regressive logic of this seeming contradiction is expressed by Texas Republican Representative Jeb Hensarling's comment, "...not all tax relief is created equal for the purposes of helping to get the economy moving again." That is, tax cuts for corporations and the wealthy are good because they may lead to investment and expansion, but tax cuts for workers aren't so good because they only allow families to buy groceries and pay their mortgage. Bottom line: to get the economy moving again, lower taxes on corporations and the wealthy and raise them on middle and low income workers.
The latest wrinkle in this drama is in President Obama's just-announced Jobs Package, in which he proposes temporarily continuing and increasing the reduction in Payroll Tax for workers (which the RTP should be against) and also reducing the employer contribution as well (which the RTP should support). The upcoming gymnastics of Regressive logic will be "interesting" to watch.
Time to buy more aspirin......
_________________________________________
Related Blogs:
Punishing the Victims (Part Un)
Misperceiving Wealth in America
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Reflecting on 9/11 Ten Years Later: Unity & Civility No More
It is hard to believe it has been 10 years since the World Trade Center attacks. So much has happened in the world and in my personal life since that moment that it seems much more distant.
I suppose every generation has a few world events that are so personally significant they stand out it photographic detail in peoples' memories -- you can picture where you were and what you were doing at the time with great clarity. For me there have been three such instances in my lifetime so far: the assassination of JFK, the moon landing, and the 9/11 attacks. I note that two of these three are negative events -- a ratio I wish was reversed.
9/11 occurred just a couple of months after my wife and I had moved here to Hawai'i to enjoy our retirement. Given the time difference between Hawai'i and the East Coast, the attacks had occurred in the early morning hours while we were sleeping. I had gotten up around 6:30 and as part of my usual routine I was enjoying a cup of coffee while checking email and reading some online news. It was then that I saw the incredible headlines that the Trade Center had been attacked and had fallen. At first I thought it was a hoax -- somebody must have hacked into the news website and planted a false story, so I checked many other online news sources, and then turned on the television to find that the story was not only true but even more horrific than I had imagined. I woke my wife and tried to explain what had happened -- I can still picture the confusion and disbelief on her face.
In the days and weeks that followed there was a heart-warming outpouring of compassion, sympathy and support from people not just in the U.S. but from all parts of the world. Within the U.S. there was a feeling of unity and national identity that was greater than any other time I can remember, though I suspect older Americans might point to similar reactions connected with WWII. Political and social differences were secondary to collective concerns of security, mourning, and recovery.
Sadly, the unity and civility of that time seems to have evaporated. Instead we now have a social climate that is characterized by the divisiveness and intransigence we witness daily among political leaders, many of whom seem to regard compassion as a budget line item to be chopped and programs for the public good as extravagances to be dismantled.
9/11 showed the positive spirit of people in the face of tremendous adversity. The spontaneous acts of selflessness and compassion that were commonplace showed that we have the potential to overcome our differences and work for the common good. I hope it doesn't take another 9/11 to make that potential manifest itself again.
I suppose every generation has a few world events that are so personally significant they stand out it photographic detail in peoples' memories -- you can picture where you were and what you were doing at the time with great clarity. For me there have been three such instances in my lifetime so far: the assassination of JFK, the moon landing, and the 9/11 attacks. I note that two of these three are negative events -- a ratio I wish was reversed.
9/11 occurred just a couple of months after my wife and I had moved here to Hawai'i to enjoy our retirement. Given the time difference between Hawai'i and the East Coast, the attacks had occurred in the early morning hours while we were sleeping. I had gotten up around 6:30 and as part of my usual routine I was enjoying a cup of coffee while checking email and reading some online news. It was then that I saw the incredible headlines that the Trade Center had been attacked and had fallen. At first I thought it was a hoax -- somebody must have hacked into the news website and planted a false story, so I checked many other online news sources, and then turned on the television to find that the story was not only true but even more horrific than I had imagined. I woke my wife and tried to explain what had happened -- I can still picture the confusion and disbelief on her face.
In the days and weeks that followed there was a heart-warming outpouring of compassion, sympathy and support from people not just in the U.S. but from all parts of the world. Within the U.S. there was a feeling of unity and national identity that was greater than any other time I can remember, though I suspect older Americans might point to similar reactions connected with WWII. Political and social differences were secondary to collective concerns of security, mourning, and recovery.
Sadly, the unity and civility of that time seems to have evaporated. Instead we now have a social climate that is characterized by the divisiveness and intransigence we witness daily among political leaders, many of whom seem to regard compassion as a budget line item to be chopped and programs for the public good as extravagances to be dismantled.
9/11 showed the positive spirit of people in the face of tremendous adversity. The spontaneous acts of selflessness and compassion that were commonplace showed that we have the potential to overcome our differences and work for the common good. I hope it doesn't take another 9/11 to make that potential manifest itself again.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Why Is That Geezer Smiling?
[*** Warning*** This is another in my series of Geezerhood blogs. Instead of reading this you may want to do something more fun, like checking your investment portfolio. Related blogs to avoid are given at the end.]
There are a lot of negative stereotypes about aging. One of them is that most older people suffer from a variety of negative emotions, like depression, remorse, and despair as they confront the problems and challenges of aging. Old people are just not happy campers.
Like many stereotypes, this one sounds reasonable. For example, depression and sadness seem like a natural reaction to the loss of friends and family, declining physical and mental abilities, and to the contemplation of one's unfulfilled goals and dreams. The stereotype of the sad geezer is especially strong among young people, but even older people seem to share this pessimistic view (Hummert, et. al,1994). In fact, just reading this is making me a bit depressed.
However, there is ample empirical evidence that even though it sounds reasonable, the stereotype is wrong, and that older people report generally higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction than do younger people (Mroczek, & Kolarz, 1998; Myers & Diener, 1995; Charles et al., 2001). According to Laura Carstensen, a renowned researcher on aging at Stanford University, the fact that emotional well-being is actually maintained and in some ways even improves across adulthood "...is among the most surprising findings about human aging to emerge in recent years" (Carstensen et. al., 2011, p. 21).
A cynic (probably someone young) might argue that this is just another symptom of the cognitive decline of Geezerhood -- no longer in touch with reality, the oldsters are in denial and just assess everything as positive. However, Carstensen's research indicates that older people in fact exhibit both positive and negative emotions to situations, often in a more complex way than younger people do: "...investments in meaningful activities under time-limited conditions elicit richly complex emotional experiences, such as gratitude accompanied by a sense of fragility and happiness tinged with sadness" (Carstensen et. al, 2011).
One explanation of these changes in emotional well-being across the life span is given by Carstensen's "Socioemotional Selectivity" theory of aging, which proposes that we structure our life goals partly on the basis of how relevant they are to the time we have left:
Our young cynic, clutching at straws now, might point out that the research showing that geezers are happier than young people is "cross-sectional" in design and that so it really hasn't demonstrated that people's emotional well-being improves as they age. It could be that the current crop of old people have always been happy, perhaps because they grew up in simpler, more supportive times.
A recent longitudinal study by Carstensen (Carstensen et al., 2011) has eliminated this possible alternative explanation by following the same group of people over a 15-year period. The results showed that as participants in the study aged their emotional well-being improved, thus supporting the earlier cross-sectional conclusion .
So, why is that Geezer smiling? You'll find out when you're older.
________________________________________
Related Blogs and References:
Jogging the Memory of a Geezer
Embracing Your Inner Geezer
How to Compress Your Morbidity
The Power of Negative Thinking
Thoughts for a New Year
So, What Do You Do All Day?
Carstensen, L. L., Pasupathi, M., Mayr, U., & Nesselroade, J. R. (2000). Emotional experience in everyday life across the adult life span. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 79, 644–655.
Carstensen, L. L., Turan, B., Scheibe, S., Ram, N., Ersner-Hershfield, H., Samanez-Larkin, G. R., Brooks, K. P., & Nesselroade, J. R. (2011). Emotional Experience Improves With Age: Evidence Based on Over 10 Years of Experience Sampling. Psychology and Aging, 26, 21–33
Charles, S. T., Reynolds, C. A., & Gatz, M. (2001). Age-related differences and change in positive and negative affect over 23 years. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 80, 136–151.
Mroczek, D. K., & Kolarz, C. M. (1998). The effect of age on positive and negative affect: A developmental perspective on happiness. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75, 1333–1349.
Myers, D. G., & Diener, E. (1995). Who is happy? Psychological Science, 6, 10–19.
There are a lot of negative stereotypes about aging. One of them is that most older people suffer from a variety of negative emotions, like depression, remorse, and despair as they confront the problems and challenges of aging. Old people are just not happy campers.
Like many stereotypes, this one sounds reasonable. For example, depression and sadness seem like a natural reaction to the loss of friends and family, declining physical and mental abilities, and to the contemplation of one's unfulfilled goals and dreams. The stereotype of the sad geezer is especially strong among young people, but even older people seem to share this pessimistic view (Hummert, et. al,1994). In fact, just reading this is making me a bit depressed.
However, there is ample empirical evidence that even though it sounds reasonable, the stereotype is wrong, and that older people report generally higher levels of happiness and life satisfaction than do younger people (Mroczek, & Kolarz, 1998; Myers & Diener, 1995; Charles et al., 2001). According to Laura Carstensen, a renowned researcher on aging at Stanford University, the fact that emotional well-being is actually maintained and in some ways even improves across adulthood "...is among the most surprising findings about human aging to emerge in recent years" (Carstensen et. al., 2011, p. 21).
A cynic (probably someone young) might argue that this is just another symptom of the cognitive decline of Geezerhood -- no longer in touch with reality, the oldsters are in denial and just assess everything as positive. However, Carstensen's research indicates that older people in fact exhibit both positive and negative emotions to situations, often in a more complex way than younger people do: "...investments in meaningful activities under time-limited conditions elicit richly complex emotional experiences, such as gratitude accompanied by a sense of fragility and happiness tinged with sadness" (Carstensen et. al, 2011).
One explanation of these changes in emotional well-being across the life span is given by Carstensen's "Socioemotional Selectivity" theory of aging, which proposes that we structure our life goals partly on the basis of how relevant they are to the time we have left:
The central change in adulthood is a shift in the salience of social goals. Younger adults, having much to learn and relatively long futures for which to prepare, are motivated by the pursuit of knowledge—even when this requires that emotional well-being be suppressed. For older adults, the reverse trend appears. Facing relatively shorter futures and having already accrued considerable knowledge about others, older adults prioritize emotional goals because they are realized in the moment of contact rather than banked for some nebulous future time.So, the picture that emerges is that older people are happier overall, but also experience negative emotions in meaningful ways. I would add to Carstensen's example of relational goals a more general openness to experiencing all life events in an emotionally meaningful way, including those we probably dismissed as insignificant when we were younger.
The theory stresses that age does not entail the relentless pursuit of happiness but rather the satisfaction of emotionally meaningful goals, which entails far more than simply feeling good. Finding meaning in existing relationships, even conflictual ones, emerges as a central task in later life. (Carstensen et. al., 2000, p. 645)
Our young cynic, clutching at straws now, might point out that the research showing that geezers are happier than young people is "cross-sectional" in design and that so it really hasn't demonstrated that people's emotional well-being improves as they age. It could be that the current crop of old people have always been happy, perhaps because they grew up in simpler, more supportive times.
A recent longitudinal study by Carstensen (Carstensen et al., 2011) has eliminated this possible alternative explanation by following the same group of people over a 15-year period. The results showed that as participants in the study aged their emotional well-being improved, thus supporting the earlier cross-sectional conclusion .
So, why is that Geezer smiling? You'll find out when you're older.
________________________________________
Related Blogs and References:
Jogging the Memory of a Geezer
Embracing Your Inner Geezer
How to Compress Your Morbidity
The Power of Negative Thinking
Thoughts for a New Year
So, What Do You Do All Day?
Carstensen, L. L., Pasupathi, M., Mayr, U., & Nesselroade, J. R. (2000). Emotional experience in everyday life across the adult life span. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 79, 644–655.
Carstensen, L. L., Turan, B., Scheibe, S., Ram, N., Ersner-Hershfield, H., Samanez-Larkin, G. R., Brooks, K. P., & Nesselroade, J. R. (2011). Emotional Experience Improves With Age: Evidence Based on Over 10 Years of Experience Sampling. Psychology and Aging, 26, 21–33
Charles, S. T., Reynolds, C. A., & Gatz, M. (2001). Age-related differences and change in positive and negative affect over 23 years. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 80, 136–151.
Mroczek, D. K., & Kolarz, C. M. (1998). The effect of age on positive and negative affect: A developmental perspective on happiness. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75, 1333–1349.
Myers, D. G., & Diener, E. (1995). Who is happy? Psychological Science, 6, 10–19.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Whack-A-Mole Maintenance
My neighbor and I stood looking at the side of my house, beers in hand, admiring my latest home maintenance project. "Looks great," he said taking a swig. But I could tell there was a lack of earnestness in his voice that meant he really wasn't sure what I had done. Being a fellow home owner, though, he wanted to show support.
That's the way a lot of home maintenance is -- it makes problems disappear but you can only appreciate the effort if you had noticed the problem in the first place. And preventative maintenance that heads off bigger repairs later on is even less noticeable. It looks the same only more so.
The joys of home ownership include maintaining and fixing things constantly. You can put this off, but you'll pay the price later in terms of expensive repairs, lots of remedial work, or a lower resale value. So most of us either learn to use tools or we line up a stable of professionals to do the work for us. The trouble with the second approach is that (a) pro's can be expensive and (b) they usually don't like small jobs and (c) good ones can be hard to find.
Home maintenance is a game of whack-a-mole, only in this version you pay a lot more to play and the game never ends. Whack one problem -- say a rotted stair railing -- and another pops up, like the stair tread your foot went through while you were fixing the railing.
Then there's the "one-thing-leads-to another" phenomenon where fixing one small thing becomes a marathon of additional projects that become necessary before the small thing can be fixed -- that small repair becomes a super-sized pain in the ass. We recently decided to have our living room carpet replaced. Other than moving some furniture and writing a big check, this required very little on our part. But of course we realized that before the new carpet went in, we really should re-paint the room. And before we repaint, we really should put in a new outlet box for the tv and stereo connections. And before we do that, we really should run a new cable through the wall for connecting the tv to the dvr. And before we do that, we really need to install another cable splitter in the crawl space. Etc., etc., etc.
Whack, whack, whack. whack.
A particularly irritating, vexing, and usually expensive aspect of maintenance is the "what the heck is that?" phenomenon when one repair reveals previously unknown problems of even bigger magnitude than the original. We were once going to put it new flooring in a bathroom, a fairly simple and inexpensive project. Removing the old flooring exposed serious rot in the wood underneath, requiring ripping out major chunks of the whole underneath structure and rebuilding it. Hmmm.
It follows that any repair or maintenance project is bound to take way, way longer than you think. Changing a light bulb? Plan on several hours. Doing some rewiring or plumbing work? Count on days or weeks. When I call my handy man to schedule help with a project I give an estimate of how long it will take, like "should be quick, just a couple of hours" -- the response is barely suppressed laughter.
It is easy to become despondent, frustrated and overwhelmed by Whack-a-Mole-Maintenance. However, whenever I begin to feel this way, I remind myself that these days I should be thankful to still have a house to maintain.
That's the way a lot of home maintenance is -- it makes problems disappear but you can only appreciate the effort if you had noticed the problem in the first place. And preventative maintenance that heads off bigger repairs later on is even less noticeable. It looks the same only more so.
The joys of home ownership include maintaining and fixing things constantly. You can put this off, but you'll pay the price later in terms of expensive repairs, lots of remedial work, or a lower resale value. So most of us either learn to use tools or we line up a stable of professionals to do the work for us. The trouble with the second approach is that (a) pro's can be expensive and (b) they usually don't like small jobs and (c) good ones can be hard to find.
Home maintenance is a game of whack-a-mole, only in this version you pay a lot more to play and the game never ends. Whack one problem -- say a rotted stair railing -- and another pops up, like the stair tread your foot went through while you were fixing the railing.
Then there's the "one-thing-leads-to another" phenomenon where fixing one small thing becomes a marathon of additional projects that become necessary before the small thing can be fixed -- that small repair becomes a super-sized pain in the ass. We recently decided to have our living room carpet replaced. Other than moving some furniture and writing a big check, this required very little on our part. But of course we realized that before the new carpet went in, we really should re-paint the room. And before we repaint, we really should put in a new outlet box for the tv and stereo connections. And before we do that, we really should run a new cable through the wall for connecting the tv to the dvr. And before we do that, we really need to install another cable splitter in the crawl space. Etc., etc., etc.
Whack, whack, whack. whack.
A particularly irritating, vexing, and usually expensive aspect of maintenance is the "what the heck is that?" phenomenon when one repair reveals previously unknown problems of even bigger magnitude than the original. We were once going to put it new flooring in a bathroom, a fairly simple and inexpensive project. Removing the old flooring exposed serious rot in the wood underneath, requiring ripping out major chunks of the whole underneath structure and rebuilding it. Hmmm.
It follows that any repair or maintenance project is bound to take way, way longer than you think. Changing a light bulb? Plan on several hours. Doing some rewiring or plumbing work? Count on days or weeks. When I call my handy man to schedule help with a project I give an estimate of how long it will take, like "should be quick, just a couple of hours" -- the response is barely suppressed laughter.
It is easy to become despondent, frustrated and overwhelmed by Whack-a-Mole-Maintenance. However, whenever I begin to feel this way, I remind myself that these days I should be thankful to still have a house to maintain.
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