The following reports from Agent Zork Zynt were received as another relayed batch transmission (# 3) and their translation appears below. For some reason the original report dates were jumbled during compression and transmission, a problem engineers are still investigating.
The Directorate is also investigating Zork's allegations about agents Drzxlop and Rodenberry. Both are repeat offenders and the charges are being taken very seriously.
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Encrypted Transmission #006 Agent ZZ to IEC Local Date 11.20.19
Zork
to Interspecies Transgression Agency: plz investigate..Looks like field
agent Drzxlop may be up to his old tricks again...just can't keep it in
his pants apparently. Interspecies dalliances are strictly forbidden,
for obvious reasons. Plz investigate.
From ABC News, Narwhal the Puppy
Encrypted Transmission #007 Agent ZZ to IEC Local Date 01.16.20
Request Agent Oversight Department investigate
possible violations of Prime Directive by agent Xcvlif, human name "Gene
Roddenberry." May have divulged a number of technology secrets, and
even the concept of "Prime Directive" itself!!
Encrypted Transmission #008 Agent ZZ to IEC Local Date 12.01.19·
Advise
Terraforming Dept. we need extensive repair to planet. Outlook grim.
Current US leader rejects abundant scientific evidence Humans are
continuing to do tremendous damage and undoes protections already in
place, claiming this is somehow making the country “great again.”
Encrypted Transmission #009 Agent ZZ to IEC Local Date 11.08.19·
Looked into Krispy Kremes more. So good but so bad! Inflict great damage to human bodies but seem irresistible. Whole range of foods like this, main diet of many American humans. No surprise humans in US have many health problems. My expanding human form making mission difficult. Can’t fit through doorways.
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1 comment:
Zork is such a dedicated participant-observer!
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